The eagerly anticipated (chuckle) Tour de France kicks off today in, of all places, London. The scandal-plagued sport is trying to erase its image as the biggest collection of drug users outside of the Grateful Dead 1969 tour. I will not be watching this year's tour as I will be too busy watching paint dry to give the Tour the proper attention it deserves.
The Cincinnati challenge to warrantless wiretaps was thrown out of court. The mindbending legal doublespeak was that information was classified, so it would impossible to prove that the claimants were in fact directly being targeted by the top secret program. Only in a court of law could they demonstrate the perfect use of circular logic.
The legal system is getting a workout in New Orleans, with a shortage of public defenders creating a severe backup in the system. The city has been unable to recover from Hurricane Katrina. Defendants sometimes spend a year in jail before speaking with a lawyer. This should probably be the best possible encouragement for you NOT to streak and get in fights at next year's Mardi Gras.
The rumor wheels are turning, with The Business magazine reporting that Dow Jones and The Wall Street Journal have been sold to evil media robber baron Rupert Murdoch. The NYTimes' blog Deal Book believes the story may be a leveraging stunt executed by Murdoch and that the deal may not be inked just yet. The countdown for Murdoch to turn the Wall Street Journal into the Fox News Journal has begun.
The Onion spoof on Bush diplomacy is perfect. The picture of Rumsfeld in front of a map of the world marked U.S. and Them may be the funniest thing I've seen in some time. The shoot-first mindset has gotten another ball rolling, with 14 members of Congress signed on in support of impeachment papers for Dick Cheney. Whatever bunker or lair Count Cheney is hiding out in, I hope he's starting to sweat a little bit.
Al Gore is on the road promoting his global warming consciousness music festival Live Earth today. Critics have attacked the event, calling it a ploy to get Gore publicity for a White House run, criticizing the musicians who participated in the event and identifying sponsors who may be part of the root cause of global warming in the first place. It seems to me that poor Al Gore can't really win anything, can he? He puts together a giant concert with every band on the planet and people are still complaining. Unbelievable!
Microsoft took a big hit when the announced an extension of Xbox warranties as part of a repair program for its Xbox 360 game console. The problem is described by owners as "the red ring of death." I don't know what causes it, but any phrase with the suffix "of death" is probably pretty bad.
In more tech news, iTunes is planning to offer special prices for selected new releases in order to drum up sales. This comes on the tail of a negotiation battle with major record label Universal. This news should keep the iPhone enthusiasts sated for the next little while.
The funniest article of the day brings us back to France, where the exercise routine of President Sarkozy has the French up in arms. People are upset by his regular habit of (gasp)...jogging. Only in a country whose national sport involves people riding bikes in the mountains would people get irate about their president running around.
There he is, your starting National League left fielder Barry Bonds (although he will wear a Giants hat to the game rather than a Paula Abdul wig). There are a host of complaints about the game as there are every year. The MLB All Star Game is like the abusive boyfriend to the fans' desperate girlfriend...he treats her badly and lets her down, but for some unknown reason she keeps going back for more.
The U.S. military is taking a better late than never approach to an issue that hopefully isn't a day late and a dollar short. The Pentagon authorized 17,700 new highly armored vehicles that will be used to protect soldiers from the expanding use of improvised explosive devices and explosively formed penetrators in Iraq. The only thing our soldiers will be missing after the new vehicles are dispatched is a clearly defined mission and a competent leader.
Bush's video game long-range missile shield plan hit an unexpected roadblock with skepticism growing not only in Russia with Putin but also in countries like Poland and the Czech Republic, two longtime Washington allies. At this point, I'm not convinced Bush could sell the reanimated remains of Cy Young, Christy Mathewson, Satchel Paige and Ty Cobb to the Yankees for some nosebleed season tickets.
If nothing else, our great President has begun to consult academics on international and historic information gathering sessions. He must be catching up from the absence of learning he achieved in his hard-partying pre-White House days (daze).
Britain is seeking to establish an Al Qaeda link to the SUV-on-fire assassins that succeeded in doing very little but stressing out the bomb squad and screwing up air traffic. The attack was led by a Kurd from in Iran, proving that Western efforts in the Middle East have now effectively pissed everybody off.
Finally, the day has arrived: Barack Obama has pulled ahead of Hillary Ro-dogg Clinton in campaign funding. I have never rooted more for the letters BO than I am right now. BO smells like it has a much better chance of winning than HRC.
The International Herald Tribune (a.k.a. the New York Times' early early morning addition) ran an interesting report on people who make it their life's work to screw over the scumbags who run e-mail scams looking to defraud people. That is great part is that the Web creates the means for international criminals to scam people while also creating an interactive marketplace where the public can scam them right back. Bravo!
NYC is trans-fat free...almost. There is a limit of trans-fats in food that cannot be exceeded, and baked goods and other items will have a one year grace period. That should extend Artie Lange's lifespan by 18 to 22 hours at the minimum to say the least.
In an effort to increase condom use nationwide, India is trying something started recently in Thailand aimed at spreading the message--naming a national Mr. Condom. I don't follow Bollywood cinema, but with a six pack like that I'm guessing actor/model Dino Morea probably has plowed through his fair share of condoms. I nominate Dino for the post.
Sometimes it's difficult for a guy to make an honest living, even if that guy is in a lion costume. It gets more challenging when the guy is wanted for rape of an underage girl, both in relation to the guy making a living and in relation to his living being honest. I hope they left you in your lion costume for your cell mates to get their first look at you.
Mayhem in Israeli/Palestinian relations continues to whip itself into a frenzy. Mother Jones harps on the damned-if-they-do/damned-if-they-don't puzzle that Abbas is locked in. You know the situation is a debacle when somebody actually recommends that outgoing British Prime Minister Tony Blair should head a reconciliation effort.
Much like the rest of Iraq, the government is in such disarray that top officials are stepping down. Current Iraqi Prime Minister al-Maliki is so unpopular that he is approaching Bush popularity levels. (The Onion parodied a new approach to one of Bush's favorite topics...climate change.)
As expected, Bush vetoed newly-proposed embryonic stem cell legislation. Democrats are expected to battle the resistance of President Bush. It will be nice to see the party stand up to something that Bush supports at least once before he is out of office.
Media news shows the bidding options for the Wall Street Journal dwindling, with G.E. and Pearson pulling their hats out of the ring. That leaves neo-con tycoon Rupert Murdoch as one of the last men standing in the bidding war for the influential and respected conservative daily. Unless Mark Cuban is willing to step in and trade Dirk Nowitzki for the newspaper, look for Dr. Evil Murdoch to make the Journal part of the No-Spin Zone.
The effort to save internet radio got their chance to voice their opinion through a concert in the capital city. Crushing royalties rates would leave those sitting in their office cubicle little choice but the vanilla options offered by your friendly Web-casting Clear Channel conglomerate. I'm keeping my support behind a choice of better flavors.
Sports and scandal continue with a newly-minted book leveling the same old charges of cheating at Lance Armstrong. Lance's credibility in situations involving accusations of cheating is equal to Lindsay Lohan's dedication to rehab. At least Lindsay admits to doing coke. Barry, Sammy, Lance and Floyd are still claiming innocence or ignorance.
Finally, Bengals fans sick of being singled out as the only team in the NFL being arrested can thank Sports Illustrated for putting together a photo gallery of arrests from the yet-to-be-played 2007 season. At least the newest remake of "The Longest Yard" won't consist of only players from Cincinnati.
