07 November 2007

Wrestling the News


























Traffic accidents are now going Hollywood...Hogan. Apparently Nick Bollea, Hulk Hogan's son, was driving like a real American when Bollea was charged with reckless driving after he was in a car wreck that came after he was racing another vehicle. The accident led to serious brain injury to the passenger riding with Bollea. Little Hogan is dropping a serious Atomic Leg Drop on the Hogan P.R. machine!

The war on terror is entering the realm of unintended consequences, with the U.S.A. Today reporting that 15,000 people may be unfairly caught in the dragnet that is the terror list, and these innocent people are unable to get their names off the black ball list. Who knows how they are going to solve this quandary, and who knows how they are going to get Don Imus, Rosie O'Donnell and Dog the Bounty Hunter added to the list? I wish them all the best of luck.

Congress has finally banded together and overridden a veto by George W. Bush. This particular bill addressed water, education, labor and veterans programs, and it marked the first successful challenge to the Presidential veto during Bush's tenure. Now all Congress has to do is oppose an issue that means more to me than water issues, education, labor and veterans programs--like Iraq, maybe?

Pervez Musharraf's crackdown in Pakistan has missed one outlet in his nation's communication sphere--the internet. Pakistanis thirsty for information are increasingly turning to the Web to get information in the turbulent country. I wonder if the Pakistani Drudge Report is as reliable of a source of information as the domestic Drudge Report.

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the Alan Colmes voice of opposition in the Middle East, is continuing to thumb his nose at American interests after he announced that 3,000 centrifuges were being used in Iran to enrich uranium that could be used to fuel nuclear reactors or a nuclear bomb. Americans are threatening further sanctions if Iran doesn't change course, and Ahmadinejad is threatening to deliver the commencement speech at Columbia this summer if Bush doesn't reconsider his position.

The Hollywood writers strike has not only screwed the fans of sit-coms, talk shows and other programs. Now, it might start to screw the other people that work on the sets of these programs, from cameramen to grips, from lighting to catering services. As long as geniuses like Charlie Sheen and Aaron Spelling can still eat, I'm sure most people in L.A. won't lose any sleep over the issue.

Hall of Fame coach Don Shula is suggesting that if the Patriots finish the season undefeated, there should be an asterisk next to the record because of the Pats' role in the Spygate incident. I wonder if the holder of the sans asterisk record has any reason to be biased about the accomplishment.

Finally, in what must be the most bizarre story of the day, two college students were arrested for kidnapping and assaulting a teenager who owed them money for drugs. The two students burned the victim with freshly baked cookies, spanked him with a paddle, poured urine on him and shaved part of his head in an effort to get money from the person. According to future Attorney General Michael Mukasey, the acts are not torture in his humble opinion because the kid probably deserved it. Mukasey characterized the actions as essential in the war on terror. He was quickly confirmed by Congress, later waterboarding the pot money out of the kid and giving it back to the two poor frat boys.

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